Anonymous asked:

Do you have sex often or do you find your eating disorder gets in the way of your sex life? I've lost interest completely :/

A happy hippy :3 Answer:

Yeah I have no interest in sex whatsoever either :/ xo

Recovery Day #470

So I have mixed feelings about the new promise to challenge myself daily, but mainly I’m excited to hopefully start to break free of this quasi recovered state I’ve been stuck in for months and months now. I wont undermine what sucesses I’ve already made in recovery, I have come a huge way and I feel like the biggest steps have already been taken. However I’ve stepped in to a comfort zone that I’ve now stayed in too long, which really has just been orthorexia. So whilst I still feel doubtful of how capable I am to stop the worst behaviours, I’m just going to try take it one day at a time and not scare myself back out of this promise.
I’m not going to continue writing my daily achievements how u have been as I can see it getting tedious, but I will put the previous days in my daily update to keep myself accountable.
I know the biggest achievements I have to make concern weighing of myself and food and counting… but I dont feel quite ready for that yet.
I first need to work on my mindset too, because at the moment ‘bad’ foods still come with guilt, and I half feel that these accomplishments are just confessions and excuses for unhealthy eating. And I know that’s not right. I know its not normal to make yourself a recluse for food choices, or fear foods, or deprive yourself of soul smiling treats. So that need work.
Today when I finish my shift I am meeting my dad for a coffee and then planet of the apes, which I am much looking forward to :) I adore my dad and very rarely see him, and I can see lots of chances for treating myself at the cinema!
Have lovely weekends, while I enjoy whats equivelant to a tuesday xD xo

Bircher Muesli Breakfast Mylk

1 frozen banana
1 apple
60g @coyo_uk natural yogurt
20g oats
1tbsp maple syrup
250ml unsweetened almond milk
Cinnamon & Vanilla to taste

#vegan #veganfood #veganfoodshare #801010 #801010rv #healthyeating #healthy #clean #cleaneating #whatveganseats #yummy #edrecovery #edwarrior #carbthefuckup #eattolive #veganbreakfast #smoothie #smoothies #whatveganseatforbreakfast #breakfast #cleanveganeating #cleanvegan #vegansofig #ukvegans #raw #rawvegan #eatingdisorderrecovery #edrecovery #edwarrior #intake

Bircher Muesli Breakfast Mylk

1 frozen banana
1 apple
60g @coyo_uk natural yogurt
20g oats
1tbsp maple syrup
250ml unsweetened almond milk
Cinnamon & Vanilla to taste

#vegan #veganfood #veganfoodshare #801010 #801010rv #healthyeating #healthy #clean #cleaneating #whatveganseats #yummy #edrecovery #edwarrior #carbthefuckup #eattolive #veganbreakfast #smoothie #smoothies #whatveganseatforbreakfast #breakfast #cleanveganeating #cleanvegan #vegansofig #ukvegans #raw #rawvegan #eatingdisorderrecovery #edrecovery #edwarrior #intake

cleanveganeating whatveganseats rawvegan cleaneating raw breakfast healthyeating smoothies yummy vegansofig smoothie eatingdisorderrecovery veganfood veganfoodshare edwarrior vegan cleanvegan ukvegans 801010 whatveganseatforbreakfast veganbreakfast edrecovery intake healthy carbthefuckup eattolive clean 801010rv

Today’s achievements

• bought and ate 2 unplanned snacks based on what I fancied not nutritional information - alphonso mango ice lollies and wasabi ginger popcorn
• enjoyed some dark chocolate as part of a snack as well as still having a little chocolate tiffin in my return from work supper
• chose a non sugar free syrup in my latte at work

Still feeling guilty about all the sugars and fats and bleh, but I’m still eating so much good foods, fruits veggies wholegrains etc. I realise now it doesn’t have to be one or the other. Life is about balance. I need to stop feeling guilty about enjoying balance.

Just recieved some uniform I ordered a while back… size 6… not sure if I’m gonna be able to squeeze I to them… dont I feel wonderful now -_-

Recovery Day #469

When I really think about it, it’s ridiculous.
It’s ridiculous that I think if I eat less than 2300 calories I’ll be fine and I’ve done good, but should I eat a date or an apple, or a chocolate or whatever, my body will just say ‘no’ and I’ll wake up obese.
It’s ridiculous to feel fine going out one day, gain a mere lb of water or whatever the next day, and feel like everybody will be staring at me and thinking I’m fat the next.
It’s ridiculous that we see people everyday who’s weights naturally fluctuate too everyday, and we never notice, and yet I think everyone will see right away my own miniscule weight changes.
It’s ridiculous that the quality of my day can be dictated first thing in the morning by a meaningless number in a scale.
Its ridiculius that I’ll go out and spend money on food that isn’t my preference, but fits my calorie and nutrient ratio desires.
It’s ridiculous that I can hate myself for enjoying a piece of chocolate or a cake or some ice cream.
It’s ridiculous that I’ll avoid meeting people, or make up excuses to have to go, so I can fit It in with my eating schedule.
Its ridiculous that I have to know everybodys plans all the time with so much advance so I can plan every morsel of food that goes in my mouth.
It’s ridiculous that if I graze on a little something extra I will take some perfectly healthy and good out of dinner to make up the calories
It’s ridiculous that I can’t eat infront of people, when eating is quintessential to living.

I want to say I’ve accomplished something new everyday. I’m scared, I admit. I don’t WANT to stop counting or weighing myself or planning, because I’m scared of losing control. But the fact is, I have no control. The food has the control. Over my whole life. And I need to stop daydreaming of the day that I can be free of these habits, if I’m not going to do anything about it. So I need to push myself. Even though I keep convincing myself its unecessary. I will challenge myself daily. Big or small. It will happen.

oh-she-glows:

Self love. This isn’t something I am used to. I usually hide my body in any way I can. For the longest while I wouldn’t even open my eyes when I took a shower. I wear layers upon layers at work because it’s cold and I feel the need to hide my body. I have had a strong dislike of my body for far too long. This is the only one I have. So why not love it now? Why not love it before I make changes to it?  Why not love the only body I am ever going to have? 

I feel society tells everyone to look a certain way. As a woman, I have to have large but perky breasts, a small waist, a flat stomach, and thighs that don’t touch. The fact of the matter is, I have none of that. I am small chested, have an above average sized waist, I have tummy rolls, and my thighs; those bad boys touch whether I’m sitting down or standing up. But that doesn’t mean I don’t have a good body? No.

I can do so much with my body. I can eat food. I can draw. I can walk for miles and much much more. I can do so much more than I think I can. Just because my body isn’t stick thin does not mean that I should not love my body. 

I may not love how my body looks every day, but I did today and I took advantage of that. I just want to remind myself (and everyone else) that there is beauty in everything. There is beauty in your tummy rolls, in your hands, and your feet, and everywhere in between. You are beautiful inside and out, and you should love yourself for that. You should love your body for that and everything it does for you.

(via floraliris)

Supersweet Superfood Goji Smoothie

80g frozen mixed berries
1 frozen banana
20g goji berries
6 walnut halves
Tbsp milled white chia seeds
Tbsp date syrup
250ml young coconut water
Vanilla & Cinnamon to taste

#vegan #veganfood #veganfoodshare #801010 #801010rv #healthyeating #healthy #clean #cleaneating #whatveganseats #yummy #edrecovery #edwarrior #carbthefuckup #eattolive #vegan #whatveganseats #yummy #eatclean #cleanveganeating #cleanvegan #smoothies #whatveganseatforbreakfast #breakfast #cleanveganeating #cleanvegan #vegansofig #veganfoodporn #vegetarian #smoothies #whatveganseatforbreakfast #raw #rawvegan #eatingdisorderrecovery #fruit #rawtill4 #paleo #superfood

Supersweet Superfood Goji Smoothie

80g frozen mixed berries
1 frozen banana
20g goji berries
6 walnut halves
Tbsp milled white chia seeds
Tbsp date syrup
250ml young coconut water
Vanilla & Cinnamon to taste

#vegan #veganfood #veganfoodshare #801010 #801010rv #healthyeating #healthy #clean #cleaneating #whatveganseats #yummy #edrecovery #edwarrior #carbthefuckup #eattolive #vegan #whatveganseats #yummy #eatclean #cleanveganeating #cleanvegan #smoothies #whatveganseatforbreakfast #breakfast #cleanveganeating #cleanvegan #vegansofig #veganfoodporn #vegetarian #smoothies #whatveganseatforbreakfast #raw #rawvegan #eatingdisorderrecovery #fruit #rawtill4 #paleo #superfood

cleanveganeating whatveganseats rawvegan cleaneating raw veganfoodporn smoothies healthyeating breakfast paleo yummy vegansofig eatingdisorderrecovery veganfood eatclean veganfoodshare edwarrior vegan cleanvegan fruit 801010 whatveganseatforbreakfast edrecovery rawtill4 healthy carbthefuckup eattolive superfood clean 801010rv

Todays achievements

- I ate a whole bar of raw chocolate, and 44g not the 22g measely serving suggestion
- enjoyed one and a half bits of lazy days tiffin, which contains real margerine (vegetable of course) and real sugar. Certainly not a health food.
- used real oil in my dinner, not oil spray
- had 150 calories over my safety ‘allowance’

Now just to achieve not beating myself up about it.

"Do not look at yourself with disgust, you are a gift to this earth. You are beautiful, you are a light, an energy, an essence. You are nature herself."
- Heidi Pickett (via purplebuddhaproject)

(via naturalteaparty)

Kidney bean stew with steamed eddoes, celery, peppers, onions and plantains baked in coconut oil

#vegan #veganfood #veganfoodshare #801010 #801010cv #healthyeating #healthy #clean #cleaneating #whatveganseats #yummy #edrecovery #edwarrior #carbthefuckup #eattolive #veganfoodshare #cleanveganeating #cleanvegansnack #cleaneating #vegansofig #ukvegans #whatveganseat

Kidney bean stew with steamed eddoes, celery, peppers, onions and plantains baked in coconut oil

#vegan #veganfood #veganfoodshare #801010 #801010cv #healthyeating #healthy #clean #cleaneating #whatveganseats #yummy #edrecovery #edwarrior #carbthefuckup #eattolive #veganfoodshare #cleanveganeating #cleanvegansnack #cleaneating #vegansofig #ukvegans #whatveganseat

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Recovery Day #468

I promised to challenge myself today after yesterdays admission.
I keep making excuses for myself not to, and not change. One minute I’ll admit to myself I have a serious problem with obsession and that food still controls my life, and then the next I’ll tell myself actually it’s fine and it’s not actually doing any harm and what would really change?
But I’m going to try. 
I had a tough time at the gym this morning -  I just feel knackered. So i’m going to spend the rest of my last day off treating myself and relaxing. Admittedly I’m a bit stuck for things to do… might just watch another film or something. But I did treat myself to a pancake lunch, I may have some popcorn, and tonight I’m going to eat the whole 44g bar of Vannoffee Raw Chocolate as opposed to the 22g suggestion. It’s a start… 

Pregym Praline Protein Overnight Oats

25g oats
25g quinoa flakes
Half scoop #sunwarrior chocolate powder
Half mashed banana
150ml unsweetened almond milk
1tbsp hazelnut butter

+ a cream brulee soya cappuccino

#vegan #veganfood #veganfoodshare #801010 #801010rv #healthyeating #healthy #clean #cleaneating #whatveganseats #yummy #edrecovery #edwarrior #carbthefuckup #eattolive #vegan #whatveganseats #yummy #eatclean #cleanveganeating #cleanvegan #clean #health #wholefoods #vegansofig #veganfoodshare #chocolate #coffee #breakfast #whatveganseatforbreakfast #veganfoodporn #vegetarian #fitness

Pregym Praline Protein Overnight Oats

25g oats
25g quinoa flakes
Half scoop #sunwarrior chocolate powder
Half mashed banana
150ml unsweetened almond milk
1tbsp hazelnut butter

+ a cream brulee soya cappuccino

#vegan #veganfood #veganfoodshare #801010 #801010rv #healthyeating #healthy #clean #cleaneating #whatveganseats #yummy #edrecovery #edwarrior #carbthefuckup #eattolive #vegan #whatveganseats #yummy #eatclean #cleanveganeating #cleanvegan #clean #health #wholefoods #vegansofig #veganfoodshare #chocolate #coffee #breakfast #whatveganseatforbreakfast #veganfoodporn #vegetarian #fitness

cleanveganeating whatveganseats coffee cleaneating veganfoodporn breakfast healthyeating yummy vegansofig veganfood health eatclean veganfoodshare wholefoods sunwarrior edwarrior vegan chocolate cleanvegan 801010 whatveganseatforbreakfast edrecovery healthy carbthefuckup eattolive clean fitness 801010rv vegetarian